HI.  I TOTALLY CHEATED WITH THIS RECIPE AND HAVE NO REGRETS.

because it's just SOOO easy. ugh. and who doesn't want a quick, go-to, 20 minute cookie recipe that totally tastes like youuuuuuu homemade it but you didn't (well you did, but it's not entirely true). again, ugh.

because um.  you're TOTALLY using a cookie mix as your base.  COVER YOUR EARS.

i know, i know.  BUT it's okay.  i promise.  because NO ONE will know.  why?  because there isnt a monster cookie pre-made mix.  there isn't!  don't google that because i maybe, possibly, might be assuming here.  but i've never seen one so clearly it doesn't exist in this world.

do you guys ever do that?  do you take a cookie mix and trash it up so that it looks like you're a freaking artist baker?  DOOOO YOU?  well now you do. 

can we just quick take a second to discuss the fact that… i'm like not even really into cookies right now? 

who am i?  i only ate one of these.  (plus the extra dough that i baked in a tart dish and ate with chocolate melty ice cream on it because i'm a psychopath.  side note: do that)

I didn't even eat enough to know for sure if they were worth posting.  but i did share them with co-workers and frankie ate half the batch… soooo it seemed like the right thing to do.

plus, even though i'm not on the cookie train right now, I LOVED making them for everyone else.  there's something theraputic about baking.  plus it makes it feel like it's christmas and christmas cookies are a must-do. 

which is why we're here… because these monster cookies are another easy addition to your cookie tray, for the i-love-being-betty-crocker-but-have-no-free-time people (i.e. me) (also: i actually DO have free time as evidenced by my lifetime crappy christmas rom com marathon yesterday… and yes frankie hated every second of it.)

wait – do you guys even know what monster cookies are?  because i didn't… until last year during my christmas cookie making session with Deb & Cameron.  and my life has been forever changed.  They're like an oatmeal cookie merged with a chocolate chip cookie merged with a peanut butter cookie + m&m's.  YES.  the best of all the worlds.  especially because there are no raisins.  life.

andddddd now you can whip them up in no-time.. you're welcome.

I dooooo have some fun facts for you.

1) the cookies will keep their shape.  that means if you put them on the baking sheet as a rounded blob…. that's what they'll look like.  if you flatten them out to look like a cookie, it'll come out looking like a cookie!  personal experience over here.

2) I used CRUNCHY (CHUNKY?) peanut butter.  I have no idea who I am anymore.  I really don't.  I've fallen off the creamy peanut butter train.  I actually ONLY have chunky/crunchy in my apartment. (so weird).

3) I stuck my oats in the blender for like ten seconds to make them more like quick oats.  it gives the cookie a little more dispersed oatmeal-y feel.  but if you're a die hard whole-oat person go for it – but that might change #1!

if you're really fancy, consider melting up some dark chocolate and dipping half the cookies in it and sprinkling the tops with sea salt.

SO INDULGENT.

BUT ALSO, WHO WANTS TO BAKE THIS AS A COOKIE PIE.  like tollhouse cookie pie?  true life: i think i baked about a bajillion of those stupid cookie pies in high school because my ex-boyfriend (at the time current boyfriend) LOVED them.

I almost think that like a monster cookie pie would be… better than tollhouse pie?  (are you cruicifying me in your mind right now?) but like.  if you do it… definitely serve it warm.  and gooey.  and with ice cream. chocolate or vanilla?  OR COOKIE DOUGH?  with a warm peanut butter & fudge drizzle.  (wait… can i revisit ice cream flavors and throw out chocolate peanut butter cup ftw?) potentially in ramekins as personal Christmas deserts?  WHY WASN'T THAT MY ORIGINAL IDEA?  I hate myself.

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SWAN DIVE.  because OUR DIET STARTS NEXT YEAR.  maybe.

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